| "playing the field" |
[ March 19th, 2008 | 7:36pm ] |
| [ |
music |
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Fiona Apple - Paper Bag |
] |
I love how the instant that that seemingly unreachable state of being becomes a possibility for me, I become completely smitten with one boy.
Prospects:
Shane
One of my Jekyll & Hyde co-workers, Shane is also an actor and has a wonderfully biting sense of humor. He's deeply sarcastic and genuinely fun to be around. I was invited by him and two of his roommates (both of which also work at Jekyll to come over on several accounts to smoke and just hang out.) He's deeply layed back and seems to be pretty fantastic.
Tall, thin, long blonde hair. 21.
Kevin
NOT SINGLE, but I swear I am in love with this man. He's one of my Jekyll managers, and I have never met a more sincerely funny man in my life. He's so smart and witty, does United Citizen's Bregade IMPROV, and has a tendency to lean towards stage combat and Shakespeare. Hence, he's the love of my life. He's so sweet and darling... I get butterflies whenever I'm around him and I ALWAYS look forward to seeing him. It litearlly tends to be the highlight of my week. Silly and girly, but wonderful.
Tall (6'3"), has some meat, crazy medium brown hair. 23.
Randy
Aforementioned. It's so strange. I always feel happy around him, even when I'm complaining about something completely random. It's odd, I really think that this could be a great and healthy relationship, but I don't have anything to compare the possibility to - my relationship with Robert was far from healthy. It was so filled-to-the-brim with drama, and I so often wasn't at my happiest around him, so it's really blowing my mind that I could have a relationship that is just two people who like each other, hanging out, enjoying one another's company, and who happened to be extremely attracted to one another.
Last night we stayed up and cuddled while watching "Enchanted." The way he touches me is just amazing. I know Robert loved me with everything he had, but sometimes Randy kisses me and there's just so much </i>passion</i> - it's utterly amazing.
And apparently the boy is completely taken with me - he asked me out on a date this Friday. :-) (We've previously been to see Eddie Izzard together as well.) Also according to word of mouth, he's been using words like "smitten" and "infatuated" to describe his feelings towards me.
I DON'T KNOW. I feel like if Randy doesn't get his head out of his ass, get over his fears of being used, and asks me to be something a little more serious (as in exclusive, but not SERIOUS serious - I don't want that either) I am going to play the field and see what's out there.
Apparently I'm attractive now, and I want to take advantage of that before it slips away.
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| although i do love alone time |
[ February 8th, 2008 | 12:29am ] |
| [ |
mood |
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 disappointed |
] |
| [ |
music |
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My Chemical Romance |
] |
I'm freaking out. It's the end of only the first day of my ten day no-people break and I am flipping out. I tried to stay productive... got up, went for a run (my new habit I'm super proud of), started packing to move into my single, organized some stuff, saw Cloverfield (holy crap it was awesome), and I'm still going crazy.
I can keep myself busy easy enough, but it's the lack of company that kills me. For every hour I don't have someone distracting me, it's an hour that I'm vulcan death-gripping my phone trying so hard not to text or think of Robert. Is this what break-ups are like? I thought I was fine... we've basically been in the process of breaking up for three months so it got a little easier each time... but he was always there. Oddly enough that's part of the reason why we can't be together. He will never move from his situation unless he gets himself in gear.
I don't know. I wouldn't take him back if he asked me to... but that doesn't mean I don't miss him. I still love him. Am I in love with him still? I'm not sure, but I am in love with the way that he made me feel. Nothing can compare to his arms wrapped around me, or cuddling looking into his eyes. But that's gone now and I have to accept that.
Alexandra and I celebrated our demo-finale with a trip to my work. What originally started out as me just checking my schedule and showing her my new digs ended up being dinner and a drunk Chelsey. Half the time my colleagues have seen me, I've been intoxicated. But they bought me all the drinks last night so I don't feel too bad.
It was great, sitting there with my new friend who I appretiate so much (she did introduce me to Sex & the City afterall, and took care of me when I had a concusion), talking to all four of the sexy male waiters who (if I'm not mistaken) were flirting with me, having my manager Kevin buy me a drink, while being sarcastic. It was a great way to finish off the day.
BUT THEN we're walking home talking about how we probbaly have alcohol problems (we've drank after every one of our demos in celebration) and this gorgeous 6'6" dark & handsome man starts a conversation with us. Graduate of Berkley & Columbia, from Spain, and a very important man at a well-known bank, Horhay (I'm not sure how to spell his name: "whore-hay") walked with us for about ten blocks. I swear to you, this man was the king of Spain in disguise. He enjoyed his job, but fancied to do something more creative with his life.
Beautiful.
Goal-orientated.
Creative.
Polite.
Fucking rich as hell.
Not creepy.
Smelled fantastic.
Why, what's that you say? "Chelsey, did you ask him for his phone number? As he clearly was interested since he said, 'I could go for a drink right now' and walked up to you to start a conversation? Plus, you were drunk so it wouldn't have been a big deal."
NO. That's right. I successfully ruined my one chance at true happiness because I have such low self-esteem I am still convinced he was more interested in Alexandra than myself.
What the hell.
Isn't alcohol supposed to make all your problems go away?
I am miserable.
|
| why, hello |
[ February 3rd, 2008 | 8:41pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
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 lonely |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Veronicas - Leave Me Alone |
] |
I definitely lost/forgot my password to this livejournal, and therefore haven't posted since... October 9th, 2007. Seems kind of fitting that my last post was two days before my first semester at AMDA, and now this post is three days before the end of said semester.
Brief Re-Cap:
Robert and I tried to make it work. But he's never going to change. I visited him over Christmas break and I really thought that seeing me would help him change to become less possessive. I was wrong. I am no one's property, and I will not have my feelings abused. We haven't talked in the past month.
I get really lonely sometimes.
I went to a club and made out with two men... who happened to be roommmates.
I got a job at Barnes & Noble.
I lost that job since I was apparently only hired as season help.
I'm pretty sure I rang up Tim Burton.
I now Hostess at The Jekyll & Hyde Club which is pretty badass.
I am completely infatuated with one of the managers there.
He's taken.
Story of my life.
I am an RA for The Stratford Arms, $787.50/month. This will successfully pay back my parents, pay off any bills I may accumulate here, and hopefully support my newly re-discovered shoe addiction. This also means I will be the proud owner of my own single dorm, which is about 1/4 the size of the dorms at Western.
That's right, you can pee and shower at the same time. Not because you're peeing in the shower, but just because they're on top of one another.
I have had my final presentation in Acting: Technique, Stage Combat, & Acting: Scene Study. All of which kicked ass.
Tomorrow I have a four and a half hour Dance Demo & a Shakespeare Demo.
After that just Theatre History (in which I am doing an Emilia/Desdemona scene from "Othello"), Practicum Demo, & VPS.
Not too shabby.
I will be literally in NY all by myself from February 8-17th. I will try very hard not to kill myself or have sex with this one guy whose going to be here that I have had a crush on since I moved even though I'm pretty sure he's either bi or gay.
Yup.
|
| happy halloween |
[ October 2nd, 2007 | 11:59pm ] |
This is my costume. Sans hat, for it consists of the board attached via elastic which is nay too comfortable around the throat. It will instead be worn as a bracelet.
And I have to work out the shoes.
Mostly, I'm just really excited to try my mace out on people who approach me going, "Right hand Yellow, eh?!"
|
| welcome back |
[ September 27th, 2007 | 12:01am ] |
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mood |
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 scared |
] |
| [ |
music |
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MCR |
] |
It's been a while. I feel like a certain pair of testicles has been taking up space on this journal far more than it should. As such, I am declaring a break from writing about the woes and misadventures of first loves and seemingly doomed relationships. For now.
I try to write like I'm smart. I hope it fools people.
While I was filing in the hellhole known as my work today, I thought about my upcoming move and my career choice. I am unbelievably excited to move to New York in ten days. Yes, partly because of AMDA, but also because of the array of people that I will undoubtedly run into and have (hopefully) deep conversations with. Think about it. New York is a city of dreamers, and of people with enough motivation to move to a city whose reputation is horrible to pursue those dreams. That in itself is admirable. But all the different perspectives, all the different stories, sensations, and experiences that await me... that is one of the biggest things I am excited and yet terrified for. Maybe I'll even get to bullshit with a french woman for a few minutes?
( I'm really scared sometimes. )
|
| To Everyone, |
[ June 23rd, 2007 | 10:00am ] |
My life is a bit ridiculous right now.
There are so many people I want to hang out with this summer, so many people in Livonia who mean so much to me. I don't say things I dont' mean, so if I've told you that I want to hang out with you, it is true.
But once again, my life is ridiculous.
Job. Boyfriend. Family. Extra Curriculars. Most likely another job.
I barely have time to breathe.
But Laura, Emily, Meaghan, Ervis, Nicole, and everyone else whose reading this, I do do do do do want to see you, things just need to slow down a little.
♥
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|
[ June 14th, 2007 | 12:00am ] |
Yesterday, Robert told me he didn't like me.
I replied, "well that sucks, since I kind of like you."
To which he replied, "my feelings go a little deeper then 'like'."
Tonight, he told me that he loves me.
And it's completely reciprocated.
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|
[ June 9th, 2007 | 2:32pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
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 giggly |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Shiny Toy Guns |
] |
RECAP:
Robert James Cox is officially my first boyfriend as of June 04, 2007.
On June 05, 2007 there was a bouqet of flowers and a stuffed animal underneath my windshield wipers after work.
He really super likes me.
I really super like him.
I am really super happy.
And I love lip rings.
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| Life |
[ May 31st, 2007 | 7:34pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
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 happy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Used - Smother Me |
] |
In a heartbeat, everything has turned around and has become amazing.
I was so upset leaving Kalamazoo and basically my family, but I've come back to something wonderful.
I started work up again at Stillman's, and lo-and-behold, just like my sister stated, a cute boy was working there by the name of Robert. When I was having issues on the male front and swore to become a suicidal nun for the rest of my (surely short-lived) life, Carly called and told me to wait things out until I met this boy.
In the past week I have:
1) Gained acceptance to AMDA, NY
2) Got a $6,000 scolarship to said school
3) Attained a my first boo
4) Felt good about myself
( This requires LJ-cut )
So yes, life is unexpedly wonderful right now and I thank God for every moment of it.
|
| What a horrible weekend. |
[ May 1st, 2007 | 12:48pm ] |
1) "No" means "No"
2) Being blacked out doesn't excuse horrible, horrible actions.
3) Just because you're gay and in love with me doesn't mean you can try to punch me & let the air out of my tires.
4) I miss Kalamazoo so much.
5) James, Mark, Grant, and Brian are the loves of my life. I owe those boys so much.
6) Theres a nasty rumor going around that I slept with Brian (who is one of my [ex]friend's ex-boyfriend) the night they broke up... and again when we went to state. This is completely ridiculous in they way that:
a. Everyone who knows me knows I'm a v-card carrying member, and plan on giving that up when and ONLY when I'm in reciprocated love.
b. I was in Livonia when they broke up... and they were both in Kalamazoo.
c. When we went to state I slept between Joel and Grant.
... so unless my vagina is a ninja, that's pretty much impossible
BUT Purple Rose called me back!! So that makes up for everything :-)
|
| Thank You!! |
[ February 22nd, 2007 | 10:42pm ] |
KIMMY & CARLY ARE ENGAGED!
♥
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[ February 18th, 2007 | 8:05pm ] |
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I must be emo.
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[ February 4th, 2007 | 1:00pm ] |
The seventh and final Harry Potter Book (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows) is estimated to cost anywhere between $34.99 & $65.
For a book.
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| I. LOVE. BOYS. |
[ January 28th, 2007 | 1:42am ] |
| [ |
mood |
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happy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Billy Joel -- Piano Man |
] |
I received more hugs yesterday from my favorite man-friends then I have received in my entire life, from everyone, COMBINED. I love when I go over there!! I feel so loved when I walk in the door and there is a unified yell of "CHELSEY CURRY!" followed by a que of people who I have to give hugs too.
AWESOME.
And it's official: 4 out of 4 boys agree I fuckin' rock at making out.
And I have a crush. A girly, girly crush.
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|
[ January 26th, 2007 | 6:57am ] |
Sara Ramirez was in the original cast of Monty Python's SPAMALOT as Lady of the Lake.
She won a Tony.
I like her even more now.
++p.s. if you haven't heard her sing, YOU NEED TOO. She is flat out astounding.
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| uh-oh! |
[ January 22nd, 2007 | 6:58am ] |
|
I am in like. Deep like.
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| love of my life |
[ January 5th, 2007 | 1:57am ] |
Anthony Stewart Head is going to be in Sweeny Todd AND Macbeth. Words cannot express how excited I am.
I need to work on collecting his filmography, stat.
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|
[ January 4th, 2007 | 2:12am ] |
I.
HATE.
MY.
BANK.
I have to pay $155 in BULL SHIT FEES.
FUCK YOU NATIONAL CITY.
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|
[ January 3rd, 2007 | 12:54am ] |
I had a discussion with my hygeniest about how we would both go gay for Angelina Jolie. It was amazing. And ohso true.
Along those lines - it was a tiny sliver of enamel that fell out of my head, not part of my tooth, which is good because I was freaking out. I guess it just felt like it was such a big piece. But my teeth are strong, healthy, and cavity free!
((because I'm sure that's direly important to all of you))
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[ January 2nd, 2007 | 5:42am ] |
| [ |
mood |
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chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Four Brothers |
] |
I came home today and checked the mail. Inside was a $50 card for Victoria's Secret. WHOOP WHOOP.
I was very excited :-) and bought myself some Desire. Yay!!!
I was excited.
|
| proof that I am God's little punch line: |
[ December 30th, 2006 | 12:01pm ] |
I am so PISSED. I am LIVID. I am a thesaurus of other words for "really really mad."
My boobs grew. WHAT THE HELL.
I don't want to be a D :-(
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[ December 30th, 2006 | 2:39am ] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sad |
] |
:-( :-( :-(
I never thought I'd want to go to Kalamazoo so badly.
weoiajlksjdflajkljaaaaa
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[ December 29th, 2006 | 10:38am ] |
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You need to watch STAY.
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[ December 26th, 2006 | 1:16pm ] |
HAPPY ELEVENTH BIRTHDAY MARIS! <3
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